“Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.” Genesis 2:24
Should I marry him or her? This is a question we have asked ourselves many times because we don’t want to make an abrupt decision and end up with the wrong person.
James 1:5, “If any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to him.”
How to find the “One”
There are many articles on the internet that talk about finding the right one, but they are written by people based on past experiences and not the word of God. It’s very important to know from God’s word what characteristics an ideal life partner should have. “He who finds a wife finds a good thing and obtains favor from the Lord.” Proverbs 18:22
Most times you fall in love with a person whom you feel would be a good spouse, but that doesn’t mean that you’re ready to enter into a marriage partnership together because marriage is a lifetime commitment.
“An excellent wife who can find? She is far more precious than jewels. The heart of her husband trusts in her, and he will have no lack of gain. She does him good, and not harm, all the days of her life.” Proverbs 31:10-12
Healthy Communication is key
Communication plays a very important role in any marriage and that is something that trips up more couples and sabotages their relationships. Lasting love is determined by the action you put forth to sustain it. We put away that, which can cause problems.
“When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I grew up, I put childish ways behind me“ (1 Corinthians 13:11). If you think he or she is “the one,” start working on your communicating and resolve conflicts in healthy ways that will help you to see if you’re ready to take your relationship to the next level.
Check if you are both ready to settle down and be bound in a relationship called marriage for the rest of your lives. You have to be true to the sanctity of the marriage vows otherwise your marriage will end up in divorce when one of the partners is unfaithful after marrying.
“Let marriage be held in honor among all, and let the marriage bed be undefiled, for God will judge the sexually immoral and adulterous.” Hebrews 13:4
Solve issues together as a team
Any issue in your life after marriage becomes a challenge both of you need to solve because after marrying, you are “no longer two but one” according to the scriptures (see Matthew 19:6). So you will no longer be able to say “that’s your issue.” It will instead be “our issue.”
If you aren’t willing to work at becoming a marital team, laying aside selfism, then you aren’t ready to even consider if he or she is “the one” to marry.
The most important thing is to lay everything at the Lord’s feet while you are contemplating marriage with someone and ask Him to guide you through His word.